You are the most important person in your life

our beautiful harbor

I have been thinking a lot today. I woke up and felt sick because I was so dizzy I couldn't move, nor get out of bed. I called both my mom and dad because I was really scared, I have never felt like that before.
After some slow moving, I got out of bed after like 45 minutes and got some oatmeal. I felt better but this entire day have been a blur.

What I realized today is that what I immediately thought of was "I can't be sick, I have to get my tax forms in, I have a review for the midterm in my class, I have work.." And that bothers me. If I was completely in charge of my life, I would have stayed in bed the entire day with tons of tea. But I did all those things I had to, and now I feel completely numb. My heart is beating super fast and I am mad at myself for not listening to my body, which is the most important thing in my life, it IS my life. All the "I have to do's" took over today.

Another thing I thought about is that feeling I always get when I tell someone that I am feeling sick, that feeling of "they don't really believe me".  The feeling that they all believe I am so weak and dramatic that I just imagine all these symptoms. But I am not imagining this. Stress has once again taken over and I am standing here without a clue how to handle it.

When I was 20, I could work 50 hours a week and be out partying on the weekends, sleep 5 hours a night, always on top. But something happened. I changed. (And I got older) I'm not going into detail, but I have a past that has taught me a lot, and that is why my thoughts today has been bothering me.. I know better. I need to get rid of stress, eliminate some stuff. And I can't do everything 100%. No one can. it's about prioritizing.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that YOU are the most important person in your life. Take care of yourself because your life is happening right now. Not when you get a job, not when you meet the love of your life, not when you have your first baby etc..It Is Happening Right Now. This is it.

Oh, and Easter is coming up. Give me an easter egg filled with Marabou chocolate and you will make my life a little bit easier.

Have a great week, and promise me to think twice before all those musts take over your day!